Childhood
Tap, Ballet, hip-hop and jazz.
My life revolved around dancing for about four to five years. I would attend the lessons every night after school at Top Hat Dance studio in Holden, Maine. My best friends: Chelsea, Bekah, Ashley and Allison would be right by my side while practicing the routines. "One and two and three and four, five, six, seven and eight." Instead of having lyrics to my favorite songs in my head it was numbers one through eight, repeating themselves every second of everyday.
Even when I wasn't in the dance studio, I was rehearsing wherever I was, school, home, on the playground, you name it. I was often giggled at by my friends who didn't dance for doing it all the time, but, practice makes perfect.. well almost perfect. My mom was constantly having me practice in front of her as well. I came home one day to find two large mirrors in my basement, "I thought these would be helpful so you can watch yourself dance" my mom said to me as I looked at my reflection.
Dance was what my life revolved around. Countless hours of going over the same steps until they were correct and then moving on to a new eight count. My friends and I lived for our performances which took place at the University of Maine. Our glittery outfits were the best part, as well as caking on make up like there was no tomorrow. By the time we were ready to go on stage we looked like clowns with all our silly eye shadow and lipstick. Our parents would take pictures like there was no tomorrow while we were performing. I would review them with my mom once we got home and in half of them I had my eyes closed because the stage lights were so bright.
I enjoyed the constant repetition of school, dinner, dance for about two to three years. One night over supper my mom suggested that I transfer to Thomas School of Dance in Bangor. I had started to give it some thought but rejected the idea because none of my friends would be with me if I switched over. Like any parent, my mom over time made the decision for me and pulled me out of Top Hat and signed me up at Thomas. I cried and cried because the anxiety of having to make all new friends and meet new dance instructors made me sick to my stomach.
The night came for me to attend my first dance class at Thomas and I was so furious that my mom was close to banding me from the computer for a week. Sitting in the car, I did not say a word and just glared out the window and kept thinking about all my friends back at Top Hat having a wonderful time without me. The car came to a stop and my mom told me we had arrived. I grabbed my nike bag with my dance shoes and slammed the car door shut. Tears were already starting to form in the corners of my eyes as my mom and I walked through the entrance door.
The building was old and the front desk to sign in was taller than I, making the whole situation a lot worse. "Hillary Craig" my mom said to the lady when she asked my name.. the woman told my mom what room to take me to and what my instructors name was. We made our way up the stairs and there was a peculiar smell the hallways had, making me hate the place even more. The dance instructor was a tall older woman who introduced herself as I walked into the studio, I forgot her name instantly simply because I did not even have the interest to remember it. Next thing I knew my mom was saying bye and told me she would pick me up around 8:30.. wonderful, I thought to myself.
After about ten minutes, all the girls had showed up and we all put our jazz shoes on, ready to dance. I stood in the corner by myself, realizing I didn't know or had never even seen any of the girls before.
"Okay ladies, I want half in one corner and half in the other."
I stayed in my corner as everyone else scurried around the room to choose what side they wanted to be on. Music started to play and one by one girls were doing full splits from one side of the room to the other. "What the Hell is this???" I thought to myself, watching the other girls. I was a good dancer but not nearly coordinated enough to do a full splits across the room, my legs were lanky and long. My turn came quickly and I started to cry.. my instructor came over and did not comfort me but instead pushed my front and bag legs down to the ground as far as she could. The pain was very difficult to maintain a she did this until I made it to the other side. By the time my turn was up, all the other girls were standing and watching me. I immediately walked over to my bag and took my dance shoes off, as anyone could guess, I sat there the entire rest of class and waited for my mother to get me.
I never ever step foot back in Thomas School of Dance again. I also never went back to Top Hat, unfortunately the experience ended my dancing career. But as they say "every ending starts a new beginning," that spring I bought my first field hockey stick.
Friday, September 23, 2011
Friday, September 16, 2011
Week 3
Travel Essay
I swear this is the longest car ride of my life... especially since I am stuck in the back seat of my Grandmother's van with my mom. Of course, we had to take the back roads instead of the interstate because everyone wanted to see the "scenery." The "scenery" is actually just a bunch of crappy houses and run-down farms strewn out here and there. We have been on the road for only two hours and I am already wanting to die.. ten more hours to go.
I swear this is the longest car ride of my life... especially since I am stuck in the back seat of my Grandmother's van with my mom. Of course, we had to take the back roads instead of the interstate because everyone wanted to see the "scenery." The "scenery" is actually just a bunch of crappy houses and run-down farms strewn out here and there. We have been on the road for only two hours and I am already wanting to die.. ten more hours to go.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Week 2
Description
The sky was a grayish blue as I at there in the grass, looking straight ahead. There was a little bracelet with a cat on it, a wind-up yellow chick, three empty beer cans, a statue of a black lab and a Monster Energy cap. I picked up the red party cup in front of me and slowly poured water from my water bottle into it, then dropped a ping pong ball into the cup. I set it down in between the flowers and the stone with the empty beer cans and took a long deep breath. A tear fell down my cheek as I looked up to the sky.
An elderly man caught my eye as I glanced over to my left. I watched as he gently rubbed his hand across a gravestone that read "Coco." He quietly stood there and then closed his eyes for about a minute- praying. I patiently sat there, waiting for him to finish his prayer. He began to open his eyes and I immediately turned back to Alex's stone, hoping the man didn't catch me watching him. I kept my eyes steady, reading Alex's stone over and over again but still aware of where it was the man was walking to. About ten feet away from me he sat, very still on a granite bench.
As I sat there, gathering up my emotions and wiping my eyes, I felt a strong urge to go and sit by the man. I picked up my keys and my cell phone and walked right over to him.
"Was that your boyfriend or brother?" He asked as I approached him.
"It was actually a good friend of mine," I answered back as I sat down on the bench.
"Ah, I say a prayer by his grave once and a while.. I'm here everyday for about forty five minutes to an hour, visiting my sweetheart."
I didn't have to guess that the stone he was at a few minutes prior was his deceased wife.
Sam Coco went on to tell me about how his wife died and what a wonderful life they had. I watched a tear run down his cheek as he told me what watching her take her last breaths was like. The 86 year old man sat beside me, in dark green khakis with a dark blue sweater on. He held is hands together, his wedding band still on his ring finger.
He went on and on for about an hour about his life, pausing here and there for me to respond. As we sat there talking, the sun slowly started to peek through the clouds and shined down right over the cemetery.
The sky was a grayish blue as I at there in the grass, looking straight ahead. There was a little bracelet with a cat on it, a wind-up yellow chick, three empty beer cans, a statue of a black lab and a Monster Energy cap. I picked up the red party cup in front of me and slowly poured water from my water bottle into it, then dropped a ping pong ball into the cup. I set it down in between the flowers and the stone with the empty beer cans and took a long deep breath. A tear fell down my cheek as I looked up to the sky.
An elderly man caught my eye as I glanced over to my left. I watched as he gently rubbed his hand across a gravestone that read "Coco." He quietly stood there and then closed his eyes for about a minute- praying. I patiently sat there, waiting for him to finish his prayer. He began to open his eyes and I immediately turned back to Alex's stone, hoping the man didn't catch me watching him. I kept my eyes steady, reading Alex's stone over and over again but still aware of where it was the man was walking to. About ten feet away from me he sat, very still on a granite bench.
As I sat there, gathering up my emotions and wiping my eyes, I felt a strong urge to go and sit by the man. I picked up my keys and my cell phone and walked right over to him.
"Was that your boyfriend or brother?" He asked as I approached him.
"It was actually a good friend of mine," I answered back as I sat down on the bench.
"Ah, I say a prayer by his grave once and a while.. I'm here everyday for about forty five minutes to an hour, visiting my sweetheart."
I didn't have to guess that the stone he was at a few minutes prior was his deceased wife.
Sam Coco went on to tell me about how his wife died and what a wonderful life they had. I watched a tear run down his cheek as he told me what watching her take her last breaths was like. The 86 year old man sat beside me, in dark green khakis with a dark blue sweater on. He held is hands together, his wedding band still on his ring finger.
He went on and on for about an hour about his life, pausing here and there for me to respond. As we sat there talking, the sun slowly started to peek through the clouds and shined down right over the cemetery.
Monday, September 5, 2011
Week 1
Nature
The sun beamed down on us as we sat and slowly rocked on the swing. The driveway pavement was warm under my bare feet, and the breeze was just enough to keep me cooled off. It had been rainy the past couple of days so the heat felt good on our skin. My grandmother to my left was silently sitting, gazing around and once and a while closing her eyes to give them a rest. Under one of the poles that held up the swing, hornets buzzed in and out of the hollow pole, venturing up to their nest. "Don't bother them and they won't bother you," my Gram kept saying as I would flinch out of nervousness when they'd come close. The sky above us was bright blue and the clouds were slowly moving, giving us enough time to respect the unique shapes of every single one.
Keeping my eyes on the hornets around us, I did not see the Eagle flying above, until my Gram said something. "There's an Eagle right above your Fathers house," she whispered. We both watched as it flew above us, slowly flapping it's wings and circling in the same area over and over again.
"They are always around here.. it's a good thing none of the neighbors have small dogs, never know what those birds are going to do."
I take what my Gram says into consideration and thank God I left my four pound dog at my Mom's house.
With my Grandmother's health deteriorating, every minute I get with her I respect the atmosphere and her so much more than usual. We were granted a beautiful day to sit on the swing together, in silence we both appreciate the life we have been given. The grass, a vibrant shade of green was slowly swaying in the wind and my Dad's dog had found a shady spot under the porch to lay down and cool off.
I peer over at my Gram as she is slowly falling sleep, her recent visits to the emergency room and ICU had left her exhausted.
"You don't have to stay out here with me Gram."
She slowly opens her eyes and gives me a little grin,
"I know honey, I'll probably go inside soon, Gram is getting tired.. used all my energy today and it's only twelve in the afternoon."
She sighs and musters up enough energy to get up off the swing. I stand up and put my arms around her, trying not to tear up.
The sunshine can bring so much life to situations in many different ways.. I kiss my Gram on the cheek and feel her warm skin against mine. We say I love you and I watch her make her way into the house. Her little white slippers slowly dragging across the pavement. She finds her way inside and I sit back down on the swing.
The hornets continue to fly around me, the breeze continues to blow and the sun does not stop shining. I rest my feet back on the pavement and place my head on the back of the swing and close my eyes and slowly let the sun and breeze put me to sleep.
The sun beamed down on us as we sat and slowly rocked on the swing. The driveway pavement was warm under my bare feet, and the breeze was just enough to keep me cooled off. It had been rainy the past couple of days so the heat felt good on our skin. My grandmother to my left was silently sitting, gazing around and once and a while closing her eyes to give them a rest. Under one of the poles that held up the swing, hornets buzzed in and out of the hollow pole, venturing up to their nest. "Don't bother them and they won't bother you," my Gram kept saying as I would flinch out of nervousness when they'd come close. The sky above us was bright blue and the clouds were slowly moving, giving us enough time to respect the unique shapes of every single one.
Keeping my eyes on the hornets around us, I did not see the Eagle flying above, until my Gram said something. "There's an Eagle right above your Fathers house," she whispered. We both watched as it flew above us, slowly flapping it's wings and circling in the same area over and over again.
"They are always around here.. it's a good thing none of the neighbors have small dogs, never know what those birds are going to do."
I take what my Gram says into consideration and thank God I left my four pound dog at my Mom's house.
With my Grandmother's health deteriorating, every minute I get with her I respect the atmosphere and her so much more than usual. We were granted a beautiful day to sit on the swing together, in silence we both appreciate the life we have been given. The grass, a vibrant shade of green was slowly swaying in the wind and my Dad's dog had found a shady spot under the porch to lay down and cool off.
I peer over at my Gram as she is slowly falling sleep, her recent visits to the emergency room and ICU had left her exhausted.
"You don't have to stay out here with me Gram."
She slowly opens her eyes and gives me a little grin,
"I know honey, I'll probably go inside soon, Gram is getting tired.. used all my energy today and it's only twelve in the afternoon."
She sighs and musters up enough energy to get up off the swing. I stand up and put my arms around her, trying not to tear up.
The sunshine can bring so much life to situations in many different ways.. I kiss my Gram on the cheek and feel her warm skin against mine. We say I love you and I watch her make her way into the house. Her little white slippers slowly dragging across the pavement. She finds her way inside and I sit back down on the swing.
The hornets continue to fly around me, the breeze continues to blow and the sun does not stop shining. I rest my feet back on the pavement and place my head on the back of the swing and close my eyes and slowly let the sun and breeze put me to sleep.
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